happy 100th newsletter!!!
where i answer some q's and do some reflecting
Congratulations TO MYSELF because today’s newsletter is my 100th post! I actually saw this coming a couple months ago, and purposely did my extra little birthday post partially to make the 100th fall today instead of next week, which I already had big plans for.
That already gives you some behind-the-scenes on how I write these newsletters, and I thought it would be fun to do more of that in this particular post. So, I’m going to answer some questions that people submitted and do some general reflecting on where this newsletter has been and where it’s going. I’m also going to intersperse the Q&A with pictures from my recent trip to NYC because, why not. Let’s dive in!
How long does it take you to write each newsletter? Do you write them in one sitting?
I am a very last-minute kind of person (I don’t like this about myself, but it is what it is). Back when I wasn’t as strict about “the newsletter must be scheduled for Wednesday at 5am”), I used to sometimes be frantically trying to finish it up while at work, which was just a recipe for disaster. It made me feel harried and stressed and I didn’t like it.
Now I tend to write them on Tuesday nights after dinner, so I’m still kinda last minute about it but at least not as bad. I write them mostly in one sitting, although sometimes I skip ahead and write the bottom sections (Currently reading, etc.) first, because those are “easier” to write and they prime the pump so to speak. Right now I am writing with the Rays game on in the background, it’s already almost ten o’clock, the game is in the 11th inning, at some point I thought maybe I’d have some of my night to myself but at this point obviously not lol.
Do you keep some sort of master list of featured songs, or are repeats acceptable?
I don’t keep a master list, although I did start a Spotify playlist of featured songs that I need to update. I *try* not to repeat (and even try not to feature too many of the same band all in a row — I have to be conscious of this with Paramore in particular), but I’ve also decided that at the end of the day I can do whatever the fuck I want. To that end, sometimes I feature no song at all (like in this post!); sometimes I talk a lot about the song; sometimes it’s more background for me to talk about something else.
How hard is it to decide on topics and songs to feature?
Most weeks, it’s not that hard at all! I have a gmail draft where I dump random newsletter ideas when they occur to me, so I can always go back to that if I’m looking for inspiration. For example, currently sitting in that draft are such gems as:
The Offspring’s “Session,” “Self-Esteem,” "Me and My Old Lady,” and “She's Got Issues” aka Dexter Holland is getting some and wants you to know it but also feels real conflicted
“Fly” by Sugar Ray - all around the world aka all around the horn aka how I do social media
“Name” by the Goo Goo Dolls and how I name characters
Sometimes I’ve genuinely been listening to a particular song on such repeat that I CAN’T write about anything else. My newsletter on “How’s It Going to Be” by Third Eye Blind was like that. Other times, I have a topic in mind and then I retrofit a song to fit that subject, like when I wanted to write about Goodreads reviews so I referenced Tegan and Sara’s “Where Does the Good Go?”.
Some content I plan ahead — for example, when I interview a writer around their book release, or when I know I want to
[RAYS WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, sorry, had to interrupt because it took THIRTEEN FUCKING INNINGS. God I want someone to dump popcorn over my head when I finish a book. I think we all deserve that.]
When I know I want to tie a newsletter to a particular date, is all I was going to say.
Do you have advice for anyone starting a newsletter?
I got to sit down with Meg Cabot once — this was a long time ago, right around when my debut YA novel came out. We shared an agent at the time, which is how I got connected with her. She is an ICON so the conversation is a bit of a blur, but two things I really remember: one, she told me her biggest advice to blogging was “keep it to 500 words, and just do it.” She said the shorter length is because that’s what people will read, and that’s what won’t feel too daunting for you to write. I DO try to follow the “just do it” advice — part of why I moved to a once-a-week model was just not to be too precious about it, to give myself a deadline and then try to hit it consistently — but I obviously didn’t take the 500 words part to heart lol. Sorry.
(The second thing I remember is that I had just found out I was pregnant, and she congratulated me when I told her. That felt cool.)
I find it really helpful to have a set format — that I usually talk about a song, I usually title with a lyric, I always include my little “Currently . . .” sections at the bottom, etc. I also like having a set deadline, as I said. I can’t find it now, but there’s an interview with Conan O’Brien where he talked about how he was a huge perfectionist but doing a nightly show actually helped that, because at some point you have to just do your best and get it done. That’s how I treat these newsletters — there may be occasional typos, I often think of things I would’ve added or changed (writing a post about Paramore and saying “difficult times” instead of “hard times” STILL haunts me at night, and I’m not exaggerating), but I think of them as semi-casual, chatty emails and so try not to get that deep about it. It’s one reason I think I like doing it, to be honest — it’s such a breezier way to write than when you’re crafting a novel.
What do you have planned for the newsletter in the future?
I would really like to write more longform posts about one piece of media — like the one I wrote about Juliet, Naked or the one about Lori Foster’s Impetuous. I have a lot of fun with those!
I really need to update some stuff like my landing page and the email that goes out when people subscribe. If you subscribed recently, you’ll see how out-of-date it is lol — sorry! Someone also recently brought it to my attention that when I wrote that two years ago, I promised more ANTM content, which I have not been delivering! At the time I was rewatching old episodes (let’s be honest, Cycle 6) and I had so many thoughts!! I also tried out for the show once and I want to tell you all about it someday.
Right now, I have no plans to open up a paid side to my newsletter. I respect writers who’ve done that; I pay for several subscriptions; I just have no plans to do it myself right now. I’d have to figure out what to even put behind a paywall in the first place, because it would have to offer more than what I’m doing here, I think — more in-depth analysis or writing advice or something. Who knows, that’s why I haven’t done it!
What are some of your favorite newsletters that other people write?
I subscribe to a ton of author newsletters, so many I can’t even list them all here. So I’ll give you seven newsletters that I open so fast gmail has started putting them into my regular inbox instead of my “promotions” tab:
Brandon Taylor’s Sweater Weather — Contemplative walks around NYC; musings on getting back into film photography; long essays of literary analysis; tennis as a metaphor; advice on specific pens and stationery supplies, I just feel like things slow down a bit and I’m really taking everything in when I read Brandon’s thoughts.
Ijeoma Oluo’s Behind the Book — I discovered Ijeoma’s writing the way a lot of white people did, probably — by first reading her brilliant book So You Want to Talk About Race and then seeking out more. I love how transparent and open she gets about the writing process, some of what she faces as an author of color writing about race on the internet, and how she balances being a person among so many outside forces.
Tegan and Sara’s I Think We’re Alone Now — What can I say, I’m a huge fan. I pay for this one because I want all the content! I love reading about how they put together a set list and how hard it is to be away from home to tour and how nervous they get before award ceremonies or big events. I also enjoy their newsletter just as a creative person, and a person within a creative industry that is also a business, because I think Tegan and Sara are aspirational as people who’ve navigated all that in an authentic and sustainable way.
Samantha Irby’s bitches gotta eat! — I LIVE for Judge Mathis updates; I NEED to know what is in people’s Accordions of Truth (TM); I also just want to see brown teeth on TV again much like Samantha Irby! No one makes me laugh out loud as much as she does. No one.
Frankie de la Cretaz’s Out of Your League — One of my go to recs to anyone looking for some of the best coverage of queer representation in sports and pop culture tbh. This particular link was Frankie’s roundup of queer sports books, for example, including The Prospects and Anita Kelly’s How You Get the Girl among other great picks. I forward these newsletters to so many people and they help make me feel like I’m somewhat In the Know even about sports I don’t really follow.
Kerry Winfrey’s No One Asked — If there’s one person I want to watch a bunch of media I’ve never seen and may never even see and write gentle, funny, moving observations about all of it, it’s Kerry Winfrey. I also pay for this one because I need to follow along on her Alice rereading journey. I don’t care about the Oscars but I care about Kerry caring about the Oscars. I don’t care about Dakota Johnson but I care about Kerry caring about Dakota Johnson. You get it.
Jess Tholmer’s Completely Booked — If you want to get a newsletter once a month with some really thoughtful, personal writeups of a curated list of books, Jess’ newsletter is PERFECT. I like the way she mixes it up, genre-wise — from celebrity memoir to nonfiction to literary fiction to romance — and writes from such a specific perspective. It just feels like you get this little slice of life with some book recs. Then if you pay for the newsletter — which I do — you also get more in-depth thoughts about Matthew Perry’s memoir and that kind of thing. One of my favorites.
Do you have any news on the preorder incentive for The Art of Catching Feelings?
A couple non-newsletter specific questions snuck in, and I wanted to answer them, too! This is actually what I’m really *hoping* to be able to tell you more about next week. Right now, I can tell you that I commissioned an art print, a couple character baseball cards, and a sticker — I’m really excited about all of them! I just can’t show you any of it yet because none of the art is final. As a reminder, if you preorder from Tombolo Books, you’ll automatically get all the swag AND I’ll personalize your book any way you want me to — just put your request in the comments on your order!
What should I wear to the Ripped Bodice Brooklyn event on July 1!! What are the vibes!!
If the vibes are anything close to those for KT Hoffman’s event last Friday, they will be IMPECCABLE. It was the most fun, talking about baseball and romance, and KT will be my conversation partner when I come back July 1 to promote The Art of Catching Feelings so I expect it’ll be a great time! Personally, I will be wearing (hopefully, if I can get my act together) my own custom jersey for the Carolina Battery, because I love staying on theme and I love having a uniform. There were some baseball-themed looks on Friday and if you don’t think I clocked every single one. I NEED that Brooklyn Beavers jacket. A Mets shirt among several Yankees hats; a true NYC mood. The custom Beaverton jerseys were obviously a standout!!! I wanted one so badly and now I have one!
So wear whatever you want and feels good to you, but if you have anything baseball-themed, all the better!!!
(I don’t usually wear makeup but should I invest in some eye black?!?)
When do we get to know what you’re working on NEXT?!
I’m dying to share more about my 2025 book, I really am! I don’t know how much I’m allowed to say just yet, but I think I can tell you that (because I’m pretty sure I already have?) that it’s John’s book from With Love, from Cold World! So it was really fun to revisit some of those characters again and also to go back through Cold World and see what I’d written about John already and how I might want to tease that out more in his book. I’m a little obsessed with his story, ngl. Plus, won’t it look great when it eventually gets to pose with the haunted doll Luci? She was one of my favorite parts of my Brooklyn trip, and if you think I didn’t cradle her like an actual baby . . . I have to end this somewhat disjointed half NYC/half 100 newsletter by giving one final shoutout to KT Hoffman and Sarah Corrente for being amazing hosts and showing me the best time while I was there.
And now, if you want to know the final runtime of this newsletter, it’s about ten minutes after midnight and I’m running later than usual. I started writing the first part around 9:45 or so; skipped ahead to write my Currently . . . section because I was watching the game and finding it hard to focus; then went back to finish writing the rest of the newsletter where the last thing I did was add the descriptions of the seven newsletters I wanted to shout out and then this final paragraph. :)
I don’t normally skip around so much but I’m a little tired and distracted, in a way that if I wasn’t being so Conan O’Brien about it all I’d say, “You can’t be tired and distracted while writing a MILESTONE NEWSLETTER, put it aside and clean it up tomorrow!” but instead I’m going to say fuck it, print it, this is 100, baby!
Currently reading . . . I read Camille Kellogg’s Just As You Are on my flight back from NYC and found it such a charming book. I went into it not knowing it was a Pride & Prejudice retelling, so imagine my delight!!! The magazine they work for is called The Nether Fields! Instead of the Bennetts, the main character Liz has a queer found family of roommates. The Wickham character of Weston is brilliant. I had a lot of fun with this one, especially after having just spent a long weekend in Brooklyn, so I felt like I could picture everything so well. I also met Camille briefly at the KT Hoffman event at The Ripped Bodice (which was perfect, from start to finish), and she’s awesome.
watching . . . I watched SO MANY movies this past weekend, which if you know me is a big deal because I’m not a big movie watcher usually. Most of them were rewatches of those movies you’ve seen a thousand times before and can thus talk over them/spend half the movie pointing out little moments you love and quoting back lines — Rocky Horror Picture Show, Labyrinth, Napoleon Dynamite. But can you BELIEVE I’d never seen Clue: The Movie before?!?!? Can you fucking BELIEVE IT?!?! Well, I fixed that. The movie was perfect, no surprises there.
listening to . . . I spent the whole weekend hanging with KT Hoffman (the event, the movies, etc.), so on my flight home I listened to his episode of the Happy to Meet Cute podcast. What can I say, it felt nice to hear a friendly voice; I still hadn’t gotten enough of talking about The Prospects; and it’s a really great, vulnerable episode all about baseball and writing and everything I love.
preordering . . . I’m debating whether I should keep this section or not. I like highlighting books that are coming out next week! But I find myself always trying to narrow it down and then getting mad at myself about the ones I forgot, several times I’ve fucked up release dates, etc. Next week, for example, I know Funny Story by Emily Henry comes out! But if you’re reading this newsletter, I also figure you probably already know that?
AHHHHH you're writing John's book??? It suddenly feels like a long time until 2025!
Congrats on 100 newsletters! Newslettering is def more informal/fun than book writing but it's still work, and I always enjoy yours.
Happy 💯 to you!